Every Friday from here till the end of this year’s campaign stumping season, we’re honoring the most outlandish, befuddling, illogical or just flat-out nutty statements of the week in Texas politics. (Talk about some fierce competition!)
This week’s Honorable Mention Stumpers:
And that’s why he agreed to debate?
“White is afraid that Perry will make the better presentation, appear more ‘gubernatorial’ in a physical sense and light the campaign afire with hard-charging accusations and polarizing sound bites.”
—Keven Ann Willey, vice president and editor of the Dallas Morning News editorial page, arguing in an online forum that Bill White and Rick Perry share the blame for there being no gubernatorial debate scheduled this fall. White has agreed to debate; Perry has declined unless White releases tax records from 1993-95.
Come on! Tell us what you really think.
“[T]he desperate grandstanding of a lying hypocrite trying to rewrite history in order to camouflage his own wretched, worthless record when it comes to protecting Texans’ property rights.”
—Hank Gilbert, Democratic candidate for Agriculture Commissioner, offering an entirely unbiased critique of incumbent Republican Todd Staples’ Sept. 15 rally for eminent-domain reform at the state Capitol.
Also, I am deeply pro-life
“I’m fond of the Second Amendment so I can take care of my family pets.”
—Gov. Rick Perry, accepting the endorsement of two pro-gun groups on Sept. 15 in Dallas. Perry claimed earlier this year that he shot a coyote that was threatening him and his daughter’s dog while on a jog.
About face, backward march!
“I think what Christine O’Donnell tapped into is an intensity, and frankly a rage, about the direction of Washington and the direction of the country that is surprising a lot of people. … We’re going to do everything we can to help get her elected Delaware’s next senator.”
—U.S. Sen. John Cornyn, speaking one day after Tea Party candidate Christine O’Donnell won an upset victory in Delaware’s Republican Senate primary over Cornyn’s chosen candidate. The day before, Cornyn had warned that an O’Donnell victory would be “a serious issue” for Republicans and indicated that the Republican Senatorial Committee, which he chairs, would likely not help fund her campaign if she prevailed. O’Donnell was the eighth Tea Party candidate for Senate opposed by Cornyn to win primaries this year.
Sure. Happens to me all the time.
—Congressman Michael McCaul, explaining why millions were missing from his required financial disclosure. McCaul, the sixth-wealthiest member of Congress with a net worth of more than $70 million, is the ranking Republican on the U.S. House ethics subcommittee.
STUMPER OF THE WEEK
So: Stick with the lemon we already know?
“I think it’s important to know what you are buying before you buy. If he’s a lemon, we don’t want him. Carfax even gives you the information on a bad car before you buy it. We don’t want to find out if we got a bad car in November.”
—Gov. Rick Perry, explaining why he made White’s 1993-1995 tax disclosures a condition for debating.
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