The Texas Miracle #24: Rick Perry Shoots for the ‘Stars,’ Misses

This week on the Texas Observer’s weekly compendium of everything you need to know, but maybe wish you didn’t, about the Lone Star State: Staffer Patrick Michels brings us wild and weird news from far-flung Texas. In the queue: the East Texas NASCAR enthusiast who won a year’s supply of Braum’s ice cream, a school district where teachers are armed and ready for battle, and the not-so-burgeoning “clown lives matter” movement.

As always, we’ll go out to the Texas Tiki Shed to get caught up on the latest and greatest-slash-worst Texas news with Texas Monthly’s Andrea Valdez, our resident anthropologist Dr. Jenny Carlson and our favorite New York import, freelancer Annamarya Scaccia, to reflect upon the Clinton-Trump debate, the state of Ted Cruz’s conscience and the role of capitalism in the socio-political oppression of bodily autonomy. (It’s a hoot, we promise.)

But sadly, this week Rick Perry shot for the stars — and missed. Perry’s three-week tenure on Dancing with the Stars is over, but not before our bespectacled former governor developed a bromance with fellow Texan, Vanilla Ice. We’ll get the Miracle’s Dancing expert, host Andrea Grimes’ own mom, on the line to break it down.