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WTF Friday: Louie’s Law, Libtards and the Lady

by Published on
Louie Gohmert
Louie Gohmert

Another week, another batch of WTF.

Perhaps you’ve heard of Godwin’s law: the proposition, generally speaking, that if an online argument runs on long enough, someone will inevitably make a comparison to Hitler or the Nazis.

In the spirit of Godwin, I propose Louie’s law: Given enough time—say, five minutes—Congressman Louie Gohmert (R-Deep, Deeper, Deepest East Texas) will inevitably say something head-scratchingly ignorant about gay folks. He just can’t help it.

This week, Uncle Louie recommends sex ed for jurists; the Lady rears her head again; and we meet the new Secretary of State’s husband.

Ladies first. Last week we introduced you to Lady (she’s knighted; I have a star named after me) Theresa Thombs, who’s running for the State Board of Education on a You-May-Have-Come-From-a-Monkey-But-I-Sure-Didn’t platform. The Lady is back this week, thanks to her ongoing obsession with Satan and some sweet illustration skillz. In a first for WTFF, we will not quote so much as show. Behold, the Lady’s latest campaign missive, via Facebook:

Lady Theresa Thombs takes on the devil. Again.
via Facebook
Lady Theresa Thombs takes on the devil. Again.

 

The Lady’s all Thombs.

We leave the Lady to meet a real Gentleman. In December, Rick Perry helped swear in his new secretary of state, Nandita Berry. Usually the appointment of a new secretary of state—quick, name the previous Texas SOS—is a mundane affair. But Berry isn’t just a corporate attorney or the first Indian-American to serve in that office. She’s also married to B-list right-wing radio host Michael Berry, who specializes in both gay-bashing and gay-bar-attending and has patriotically called for mosques to be blown up. Anyway, he was asked by a Houston blogger if he’d need to tone it down now that his wife was in a position of authority.

He responded thusly:

 “She’s the Secretary of State, I’m the Czar of Talk Radio. Only angry libtard supposed feminists would ever blame her for what someone else says.”

It’s funny, we assume, because it’s “liberal” plus “retard.”

Finally, that brings us at long last to Uncle Louie. Asked what he thought about federal judges striking down bans on same-sex marriage, Louie’s mind immediately leapt to the mechanics of gay sex.

“They need some basic plumbing lessons.”

I feel bad for this small business-owner in San Diego.

Forrest Wilder, a native of Wimberley, Texas, is associate editor of the Observer. Forrest specializes in environmental reporting and runs the “Forrest for the Trees” blog. Forrest has appeared on Democracy Now!, The Rachel Maddow Show and numerous NPR stations. His work has been mentioned by The New York Times, the Washington Post, the New Yorker, Time magazine and many other state and national publications. Other than filing voluminous open records requests, Forrest enjoys fishing, kayaking, gardening and beer-league softball. He holds a bachelor's degree in anthropology from the University of Texas at Austin.

  • 1bimbo

    and don’t forget: ‘TeapubliKKKtards’ ‘baggers’ and ‘RAPE-publicans’. perhaps an opinion piece about the vitriol spewing from both sides of the aisle might help peel the bloody scab off the wound of discourse which is prevalent in today’s enlightened discussions about politics.

  • lessthantolerant

    While I don’t support religious fanatics, I find the leftists worse. Look at how they have decimated blacks and now work at Hispanics.

    Their abortion support alone is akin to Stalin and Hitler on a historic scale.

    WHO HAS ABORTIONS?
    In 2009, 85% of all abortions were performed on unmarried women (CDC).
    Women living with a partner to whom they are not married account for 25% of abortions but only about 10% of women in the population (NAF).
    In 2009, 55.3% of abortions were performed on women who had not aborted in the past; 36.6% were performed on women with one or two prior abortions, and 8.1% were performed on women with three or more prior abortions (CDC).
    Among women who obtained abortions in 2009, 40.2% had no prior live births; 46.3% had one or two prior live births, and 13.6% had three or more prior live births (CDC).

    Women between the ages of 20-24 obtained 33% of all abortions in 2009; women between 25-29 obtained 24% (CDC).
    In 2009, women aged 20-29 years had the highest abortion rates (27.4 abortions per 1,000 women aged 20-24 years and 20.4 abortions per 1,000 women aged 25-29 years) (CDC).

    50% of U.S. women obtaining abortions are younger than 25; women aged 20-24 obtain 33% of all U.S. abortions and teenagers obtain 17% (AGI).
    In 2009, adolescents under 15 years obtained .05% of all abortions, but had the highest abortion ratio, 785 abortions for every 1,000 live births (CDC).
    Black women are more than 4.8 times more likely than non-Hispanic white women to have an abortion, and Hispanic women are 2.7 times as likely (AGI).
    The abortion rate of non-metropolitan women is about half that of women who live in metropolitan counties (NAF).

    The abortion rate of women with Medicaid coverage is three times as high as that of other women (NAF).

    37% of women obtaining abortions identify themselves as Protestant, and 28% identify themselves as Catholic (AGI).
    At current rates, nearly one-third of American women will have an abortion (AGI).
    WHY ARE ABORTIONS PERFORMED?
    On average, women give at least 3 reasons for choosing abortion: 3/4 say that having a baby would interfere with work, school or other responsibilities; about 3/4 say they cannot afford a child; and 1/2 say they do not want to be a single parent or are having problems with their husband or partner (AGI).
    Only 12% of women included a physical problem with their health among reasons for having an abortion (NAF).

    One per cent (of aborting women) reported that they were the survivors of rape (NAF).

    So as we see liberals like to say woman have a right to choose, obviously woman have been brain washed well enough to act like animals who have no responsibility for their actions.

    This same evil is used to cull the minorities also.

    We are truly on the road to decay.

    Leftists will do anything to gain and retain power. Even using population control of your favorite minorities

    • brian whittle

      if you don’t like abortion don’t have one. The simplest way to decimate the abortion rate is comprehensive sex decent sex education and contraception cover, Texas with its sex before marriage is icky sex ed helps no one.